Writing destination wedding vows can be more difficult than it appears. Nowadays, instead of the customary “Til death do us part,” couples are increasingly making their own wedding vows. It’s not uncommon to witness a wedding when the vows are especially personalized, whether couples wish to distance themselves from religion or simply don’t believe the script conveys their love for one another. For all those staring at your notebook or writing app looking for inspiration, we got just the thing for you:
Get a head start.
If you’re planning on writing your own vows, get started as soon as possible. Give yourself plenty of wiggle room if you’re going to go through numerous revisions and a lot of procrastination.
Talk to your fiance about it.
While your exact vows should be kept a secret until the big day, it’s good chatting with your betrothed about the styles you want to incorporate. Consider what commitments you want to make to each other, whether you want the vows to be romantic or lighthearted, and who gets first crack at telling the story.
Make a list.
Don’t worry about sounding too professional in your early drafts of your vows. Simply compose a list of everything you’d like your partner to be aware of. You can worry about making sentences out of them afterwards.
Questions to ask if you get stuck.
Why did you decide to get married?
What did you think when you first saw your partner?
How do you know you are in love? When did you realize it?
How has your relationship changed you?
Have you gone through any hard times together? How did you get through them?
What makes your relationship work?
Read other vows for examples.
If you’re stuck, look at other vows for inspiration. There are many vows available online, or you can ask a friend who has written their own vows for assistance.
Don’t rush it.
Wedding vows are intimate and should be treated as such. That implies they require patience and time. Don’t feel obligated to complete everything in one sitting. Take your time with your vows, going over them over and again until you’re certain they express precisely what you want them to.
Make it personal from the get-go.
When drafting your own wedding vows, begin by making them as personal as possible right away. Make a statement about who your partner is to you, whether he or she is your best friend, your life’s love, or both. Make your lover aware of how much you value them.
Address what you love about your partner.
A wedding is a significant event; it’s a commitment that you’ll love this person for the rest of your life! So spend some time thinking about what you like about your partner. This is a perfect moment to talk about your love story or when you discovered you wanted to spend the rest of your life with each other. Don’t go into too much detail; just the most important ones. You have an eternity to tell your lover everything, but only a few hours until the wedding ceremony!
Make your promises.
Your vows should include the commitments you’re making to your partner – maybe not to love, cherish, and obey, but some specific ways you promise to adore them. Maybe you’ll promise to always be there for them, or to always dry the dishes after you’ve finished watching them. Be witty, be nice, but don’t forget to tell your lover how much you adore them.
Incorporate inside jokes.
It’s easy to feel that your wedding is more about the guests than it is about you. Your vows are your opportunity to go back to the heart of the matter: spending the rest of your life with your one true love! Make your vows amusing by including inside jokes or phrases that let your partner know you’re just thinking about them right now.
Add some romance.
However, keep in mind that these are wedding vows, so go ahead and be as cheesy as you want. Now is the opportunity to say every platitude you’ve ever considered but never voiced about your sweetheart!
Don’t forget to reassure your partner.
One key commitment to include in your vows is to guarantee your partner that you will always be there for them, even when things are difficult. Even if you don’t use those exact words, this is the spirit of “in sickness and in health.”
Make plans for the future.
Mention particular goals, desires, and future plans near the end of your vows. What will you do as a couple, and how will your love endure? Mention something you’re excited to share with the love of your life.
Make it eternal.
Finish your vows by promising to love your spouse indefinitely, till death do you part.
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